Summer 2015
Dear honey bunny
I've not written to you for oh - ever-so long. I found out that your biological dad Darren (BDD) is cyber stalking me badly and it's made me not want to talk. It's been so traumatic and I've been poorly for many months now and although I am well again now, BDD's malice hangs around my online activity like a rotten odour.
You my love though, remain to be unflappably happy throughout, my ray of sunshine. You are the kindest, most supportive, non-judgemental, down to earth person that I have ever met, and I have met a lot of people in my life. You are suffering a bit too though through BDD's actions, and we have to move house again which is upsetting for both of us. You are really settled in the village and have friends here and are doing brilliantly at school. It's with a heavy heart that I have to move us but BDD is intent on stalking me and making threats so we have to go, for our own safety and security. It shadows my days. You know there is a police alarm in the house and one we take with us. It's not fair on you.
Back in March a judge decided you had to see BDD against both of our wishes and against the advice of all the many many people trying to keep us safe. The judge said that BDD was allowed to cyber stalk me and he took upon that allowance wholeheartedly, even getting arrested now for stalking my support worker.
It's hard for me to hide all this from you, and try to keep you safe and happy. It's affected your eating and made you a bit aggressive. You are so protective of me that I worry what will happen when you find out what BDD did to me. Please, don't get yourself into trouble, if I am gone I am gone, just make sure you have a great life filled with fun and adventure. Be kind to people and please fight for me to stop this happening to other families.
At school you are shining. Your best mates are Da, S and Ha in your class and Fr & No in older classes . You came out as achieving as expected across all areas and excelled at number which I am glad for. I am really not great with numbers so I've made sure you always have plenty of numbers around the home so that you feel comfortable with them. You can read now, most things, and are not afraid to ask if you need help. Reading is the greatest thing ever, because you can find out whatever you like. I've got pictures of yours framed around the house and letters you have written to me - I love you so much and I am thrilled when you make me something special.
Just be careful about reading things online because there are nasty jealous people out there who want to hurt kind people. But never stop this letting you be kind, because if you go against your soul, it will hurt you. Just meditate, and learn strength to detach from the knocks of life and know that the pain someone inflicts on you is always their fault and not yours.
Since starting school you've switched your play habits from Thomas to Batman, Star Wars, and Batman and Star Wars Lego, mostly through the brilliant Lego films and the Wii games. You sleep in your bed now on school nights and at the weekend we snuggle up in my bed and watch films. You are my favourite person in the world and I am yours, and we have a home filled with love and fun, despite the troubles. You did and art project at school and had to draw your favourite place in the world and you drew home. This breaks my heart even more knowing we will soon have to leave it. I hope you will come to realise that all the love and toys and Shadow and Lady will still be in the new home, and you never know, we will probably be even happier there where we are safe at last.
Lady is our Ball Python and we had her as a rescue and watch her grow. I went to a festival to do a stall last year and came back with a new friend who was a snake rescuer. I took you round to see all of his collection of snakes and creepy crawlies and we loved the Pythons so much that I took the next rescue off his hands. She is beautiful, so gentle yet strong,and really soothing to handle.
It's the morning now and you are stirring in my bed so I am going to sign off and come back another day.
You say to me "I love you more than you love me" and I say "Thats impossible becasue I love you more than anyone has ever loved anybody ever." so I am going to win this time and end this post on:
I love you more than anybody has ever loved anybody EVER!! :p
mwah! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
your crazy haired MUM xxxxxxxxxxx
I've not written to you for oh - ever-so long. I found out that your biological dad Darren (BDD) is cyber stalking me badly and it's made me not want to talk. It's been so traumatic and I've been poorly for many months now and although I am well again now, BDD's malice hangs around my online activity like a rotten odour.
You my love though, remain to be unflappably happy throughout, my ray of sunshine. You are the kindest, most supportive, non-judgemental, down to earth person that I have ever met, and I have met a lot of people in my life. You are suffering a bit too though through BDD's actions, and we have to move house again which is upsetting for both of us. You are really settled in the village and have friends here and are doing brilliantly at school. It's with a heavy heart that I have to move us but BDD is intent on stalking me and making threats so we have to go, for our own safety and security. It shadows my days. You know there is a police alarm in the house and one we take with us. It's not fair on you.
Back in March a judge decided you had to see BDD against both of our wishes and against the advice of all the many many people trying to keep us safe. The judge said that BDD was allowed to cyber stalk me and he took upon that allowance wholeheartedly, even getting arrested now for stalking my support worker.
It's hard for me to hide all this from you, and try to keep you safe and happy. It's affected your eating and made you a bit aggressive. You are so protective of me that I worry what will happen when you find out what BDD did to me. Please, don't get yourself into trouble, if I am gone I am gone, just make sure you have a great life filled with fun and adventure. Be kind to people and please fight for me to stop this happening to other families.
At school you are shining. Your best mates are Da, S and Ha in your class and Fr & No in older classes . You came out as achieving as expected across all areas and excelled at number which I am glad for. I am really not great with numbers so I've made sure you always have plenty of numbers around the home so that you feel comfortable with them. You can read now, most things, and are not afraid to ask if you need help. Reading is the greatest thing ever, because you can find out whatever you like. I've got pictures of yours framed around the house and letters you have written to me - I love you so much and I am thrilled when you make me something special.
Just be careful about reading things online because there are nasty jealous people out there who want to hurt kind people. But never stop this letting you be kind, because if you go against your soul, it will hurt you. Just meditate, and learn strength to detach from the knocks of life and know that the pain someone inflicts on you is always their fault and not yours.
Since starting school you've switched your play habits from Thomas to Batman, Star Wars, and Batman and Star Wars Lego, mostly through the brilliant Lego films and the Wii games. You sleep in your bed now on school nights and at the weekend we snuggle up in my bed and watch films. You are my favourite person in the world and I am yours, and we have a home filled with love and fun, despite the troubles. You did and art project at school and had to draw your favourite place in the world and you drew home. This breaks my heart even more knowing we will soon have to leave it. I hope you will come to realise that all the love and toys and Shadow and Lady will still be in the new home, and you never know, we will probably be even happier there where we are safe at last.
Lady is our Ball Python and we had her as a rescue and watch her grow. I went to a festival to do a stall last year and came back with a new friend who was a snake rescuer. I took you round to see all of his collection of snakes and creepy crawlies and we loved the Pythons so much that I took the next rescue off his hands. She is beautiful, so gentle yet strong,and really soothing to handle.
It's the morning now and you are stirring in my bed so I am going to sign off and come back another day.
You say to me "I love you more than you love me" and I say "Thats impossible becasue I love you more than anyone has ever loved anybody ever." so I am going to win this time and end this post on:
I love you more than anybody has ever loved anybody EVER!! :p
mwah! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
your crazy haired MUM xxxxxxxxxxx
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