My year one boy
Hello honey,
The summer has been fantastic, lazy days and trips out together. We now have a tandem attachment for the bikes and so we load them onto the car and go out together to find places to cycle. You are never bored and always so happy, you are extra sunshine to my summer days. I always did love to hang out with you and you are such great company. You are the kindest, most compassionate, understanding and non judgemental person I have ever met. Your love is so pure and selfless that it just bowls me over. Your future partner, if you decide to find one, is going to be the luckiest lady/man in the world. Or you may choose to be single, and that is OK too.
There is not a day goes by when I don't receive complements from you, about what a great mum I am or how beautiful you see me to be. If you have sweets, you always share them and most times give me your last and first one. You are the best, you are perfect inside and out. From your little mirror-of-mine-but-better toes to your slim strong legs, your firm tummy and strong chest, your perfect happy face and deep clear eyes all topped with masses of free-spirited hair, you are beautiful. Your perfect soft skin is now flecked with the scars of chicken pox but that is slowly fading. Here and there are nicks and scars that you've gained through adventurous play. You never really hurt yourself though, you know your limits and are not reckless.
You often talk about "when I was last sixteen". You tell me of your life in Africa and that you went round everyones houses cleaning their toilets. The toilets weren't like ours but flat on the floor with a hole. How could you possibly know about such toilets unless you really had lived before? You had a mean Mum but then you went to live with a new one who was kind. You tell me I was in your life back then. You have said that you died from physical violence while you were making everyone teas. Strange and fascinating. I love to listen to you talk.
Right up until recently you couldn't say "sh", so shark was "sark" and sh*t was "sit". You still have a bit of a cute lisp, but I don't correct you. I am hearing the "sh" sound more now, and you correct yourself sometimes but I love your speech. When I was small people criticised the way I talked, corrected and made me feel bad, and so I just didn't talk so much. I love the way you talk. You have phrases like "don't-a-posed-ta" for don't supposed to. You have a lovely sweet helium-child voice but people listen to you, and you talk with authority. I don't criticise you of you get a fact wrong, I listen and believe you, because you are important and deserve respect. You will figure out minor factual errors in due course, but now, you need to be listened to and believed.
We have had a mindful summer, or so I have tried to. We've been meditating together, or, rather I have been meditating while wondering if any of it has been going into your brain too. Then a few days ago, you made up a meditation especially for me and I knew that the practice had reached you too. Young people learn from example and so I try very hard to be kind and compassionate and gentle.
It's hard sometimes, because I have my own big bag of worries, and feel too sad to describe sometimes. I must hide it though because today at our Refresh Wednesday you told me I am always happy. Refresh Wednesday goes like this: Step one, tell the other person about their good qualities. Step two, apologise for anything that's happened in the week that you did that made the other person feel bad. Step three, tell the other person if there's anything that they did to make you feel bad. I got it from the book Planting Seeds. Previously to this I had a "check in", a kind of performance review where I asked you periodically what I was doing good and what I could do better. It's been helpful, and reflective. I value your opinion and your feelings are very important to me.
Our lives are fluid and changing like a river but the one rock that remains is our love. Strong and true and forever. We have our worries, but we are a strong unit. I hope that we have built strong foundations in our first five and a half years together. You are my rock and I want you to feel safe as well. I think we are doing OK so far.
"I'm your mummy, im your mummy cos you lived in my tummy" lol.
You love Batman, and Lego, and Lego Batman and Justice League and My Little Pony and Star Wars and Tinkerbell, a good mix of fierce and gentle. But most of all, you love your Mummy, and she loves you, so sooooooo much.
Forever your Mum xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
The summer has been fantastic, lazy days and trips out together. We now have a tandem attachment for the bikes and so we load them onto the car and go out together to find places to cycle. You are never bored and always so happy, you are extra sunshine to my summer days. I always did love to hang out with you and you are such great company. You are the kindest, most compassionate, understanding and non judgemental person I have ever met. Your love is so pure and selfless that it just bowls me over. Your future partner, if you decide to find one, is going to be the luckiest lady/man in the world. Or you may choose to be single, and that is OK too.
There is not a day goes by when I don't receive complements from you, about what a great mum I am or how beautiful you see me to be. If you have sweets, you always share them and most times give me your last and first one. You are the best, you are perfect inside and out. From your little mirror-of-mine-but-better toes to your slim strong legs, your firm tummy and strong chest, your perfect happy face and deep clear eyes all topped with masses of free-spirited hair, you are beautiful. Your perfect soft skin is now flecked with the scars of chicken pox but that is slowly fading. Here and there are nicks and scars that you've gained through adventurous play. You never really hurt yourself though, you know your limits and are not reckless.
You often talk about "when I was last sixteen". You tell me of your life in Africa and that you went round everyones houses cleaning their toilets. The toilets weren't like ours but flat on the floor with a hole. How could you possibly know about such toilets unless you really had lived before? You had a mean Mum but then you went to live with a new one who was kind. You tell me I was in your life back then. You have said that you died from physical violence while you were making everyone teas. Strange and fascinating. I love to listen to you talk.
Right up until recently you couldn't say "sh", so shark was "sark" and sh*t was "sit". You still have a bit of a cute lisp, but I don't correct you. I am hearing the "sh" sound more now, and you correct yourself sometimes but I love your speech. When I was small people criticised the way I talked, corrected and made me feel bad, and so I just didn't talk so much. I love the way you talk. You have phrases like "don't-a-posed-ta" for don't supposed to. You have a lovely sweet helium-child voice but people listen to you, and you talk with authority. I don't criticise you of you get a fact wrong, I listen and believe you, because you are important and deserve respect. You will figure out minor factual errors in due course, but now, you need to be listened to and believed.
We have had a mindful summer, or so I have tried to. We've been meditating together, or, rather I have been meditating while wondering if any of it has been going into your brain too. Then a few days ago, you made up a meditation especially for me and I knew that the practice had reached you too. Young people learn from example and so I try very hard to be kind and compassionate and gentle.
It's hard sometimes, because I have my own big bag of worries, and feel too sad to describe sometimes. I must hide it though because today at our Refresh Wednesday you told me I am always happy. Refresh Wednesday goes like this: Step one, tell the other person about their good qualities. Step two, apologise for anything that's happened in the week that you did that made the other person feel bad. Step three, tell the other person if there's anything that they did to make you feel bad. I got it from the book Planting Seeds. Previously to this I had a "check in", a kind of performance review where I asked you periodically what I was doing good and what I could do better. It's been helpful, and reflective. I value your opinion and your feelings are very important to me.
Our lives are fluid and changing like a river but the one rock that remains is our love. Strong and true and forever. We have our worries, but we are a strong unit. I hope that we have built strong foundations in our first five and a half years together. You are my rock and I want you to feel safe as well. I think we are doing OK so far.
"I'm your mummy, im your mummy cos you lived in my tummy" lol.
You love Batman, and Lego, and Lego Batman and Justice League and My Little Pony and Star Wars and Tinkerbell, a good mix of fierce and gentle. But most of all, you love your Mummy, and she loves you, so sooooooo much.
Forever your Mum xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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